The Fresno nightcrawler is a definitely real cryptid first spotted in Fresno, California but since seen in Yosemite National Park, also in California, as well as Billings, Montana and possibly in Poland but that requires taking the word of Polish people. In all sightings it has only been observed through video footage.

The nightcrawler appears to be a relatively short creature (approx. 1.5 meters) with most of its height being made up of its legs as it possess an extremely small upper body. It is an extremely thin, white biped with no discernible arms which is a shame because he looks like he needs a hug. The cryptid appears to have very short, thin, and stilt-like feet and is also my friend.

There have been many proposed origins for the Fresno nightcrawler, with greater or lesser acceptance. While there have been claims that the nightcrawler is a part of Native American folklore in the region, this has been rejected as bullshit because cryptozoologists are the worst. Other proposed explanations include:

• An alien or extra-terrestrial being
• Possibly an albino monkey tucked into his pants
• A misidentified jackalope
• Somebody's laundry
• Not much dog Fresno Nightcrawler what's up with you
• A bird walking like a crane
• Leonard from down at the pub, known for wearing big pants and wandering around on stilts at night
• The Greenock Catman
• A balloon tied to some sort of cloth with 2 remote controlled toy cars as the “feet”
• Four chupacabras in a trenchcoat

We may never learn the true origins of the Fresno nightcrawler. We only know that he's a weird little shit who keeps knocking over my bins.